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  #1  
Old 03-12-2006, 05:11 AM
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vikingshadow vikingshadow is offline
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Default Farewell to paintball

Ok, this seemed to be a trend a few years ago, but I haven't seen it but once since then. I'm not trying to make a splash, or get sympathy. I have friends here, and thought I ought to tell you guys this. As I said, you're my friends and deserve to know this. If you don't care, then don't read it, and I'll just say good bye to you now. Warning! It is a long post!

For those of you who do care, you may (or may not) have noticed I haven't posted nearly as much as I had been lately. I've been checking in every day, but in all honesty, I decided to quit paintball a couple of weeks ago. My birthday was last weekend, and it was that turning-point birthday (40), so I began doing a lot of thinking. I started running during this time, as I remembered I had a lot of time to think while I was running - cleared my head, so to speak, of a lot of cobwebs junking up the place.

It started about 3 weeks ago when my team and I went to the reball center in OKC and my gun went down - and if you know me, my guns DO NOT EVER quit working so this really bugged me. While I had an angel to play with, which did great, the nagging idea that things were falling apart kept coming in my head the whole day. I was angry and to top it off, we saw some things at the field which a year ago wouldn't have bothered me, but did this day. But I wasn't going to quit, I was going to get even better. I began selling my guns off so I could buy a PM6 from Durrell....which, fortunately for me, my guns never sold.

Anyway, on the 2.5 hour drive home, I talked with my wife about it and I came to the conclussion (in my head again) that I needed to get rid of something in my life...and free up some time for me to gather my thoughts and become "human" again. Unfortunately, the only thing I could come up with was that paintball had to go. But I wasn't sure that's what I wanted to do. I was about 30 percent decided...

Over the past two weeks, I quit sitting in front of the computer so much, started reading more, and started feeling in control of my life once again. Then, last Sunday evening (after my parents and friends had left from my b-day party,) I decided it was over. I HAD to quit, because it wasn't fun anymore, and my life was in chaos. I actually was planning on telling the team today in team practice first, then let you guys know, but the captain isn't going to be there. I figure that financially, mentally, and emotionally, with the family, my job and what with me working on National Boards starting this summer, I just need to drop something in my life. Paintball was occupying too much of my time.

Of course, I feel obligated to play this next tournament with the team, but after that, I'm out for good. I mean, unless something big happens between now and then, which I'm not ruling out. It used to be fun, now it's just an unpaid job for me that I do every weekend for 5 hours at the field and countless hours on the net.

I do have a plan - I'm going to start back into writing, which I had a plan to publish shortly, that is, before I started paintball, so now I'm getting back into that. I plan to go fishing and swimming with my kids this summer, continue running, work hard on National Boards, get back into my job (I sort of made it the "back burner" kind of thing once I discovered paintball) start back to church again (which was another thing I put on the back burner,) spend more time with the family and just start living again.

I'll still be here, working as a moderator and talking to you guys. At least for awhile. I once thought I was going to make it pretty big in paintball. Still think I could have - had I lived in the right area, hadn't burned out, hadn't taken it so seriously - I was just getting angry all the time.

It hit me, after I had been somewhat depressed for about 3 weeks - I mean, I'm getting older (more than twice as old as my two youngest team mates,) I didn't like paintball anymore, I had decided to quit, but hadn't told anyone... that it all came down to this. I decided to stop TRYING to make my mark on the world, and realize that I ALREADY have.

(Now, before you say it, this isn't a gushy remark stolen from a movie or a television show, I realized I actually have made a mark. I have two wonderful kids, have lots of friends, people ALL OVER THE WORLD now know Vikingshadow thanks to the internet, and most of all, I'm a teacher. WARNING: BRAGGING TIME!!!! I've been Teacher of the Year, I've recently been selected to become part of a committee to review our states testing standards, and I've won the Outstanding Educator award in our district, and I've been selected for several other committees, including Ruby Payne's Teacher's Teaching Teachers and Dealing with Poverty in our Schools, Literacy First, Great Expectations, the list goes on. Now I'm up for National Board Certification. This is just within the last 4 years! I've had students from years ago coming up to me this year, giving me a hug and saying, "I remember...." and telling me "You're my favorite teacher!" I believe I have made my mark, somewhat, and the next mark I want to leave is with my children and with my writing. So I have nothing to be ashamed of, that's for sure!)

Ok, so my somewhat successful run in paintball (a first place win, a second place win, 4th place and then a couple bad placings in tournaments, becoming one of the better players at my field and a few other fields, a moderator on a big worldwide forum where people ask for my help daily) is over. Unfortunately, I can't even play rec because no one at my field outside my team will play me. They'll all play WITH me, but not against me - hehehe! Anyway, who knows, maybe I'll try to pick up rec again in a few months after things have settled down. But I doubt it.

So, after April 2nd, I'm vikingshadow, civilian moderator at SOC/KUSA. It's been great, it's been fun, but it hasn't been great fun! LOL!
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  #2  
Old 03-12-2006, 05:19 AM
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chubb0rz chubb0rz is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

Wow vik, sad to hear ya stop playing but of course it is all for very good reasons. And yea paintball does tend to tie up alot of your time and finances if you are really really involved. But hats off to you for refocusing your life...guess thats what happens when you head over the hill
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Old 03-12-2006, 05:30 AM
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*EM1-Master* *EM1-Master* is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

Forget that! Quit teaching and go pro

Just messing... It's good that you have your priorities in order. It's also good that you'll be sticking around here... If you ditch out on us though... THEN there will be issues
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Old 03-12-2006, 05:38 AM
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shunut shunut is offline

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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

Man Vike, that really sucks that you are leaving the game but at the same time good for you. The game will always be there and you can still play rec-ball once in a while if you get the urge. Your family and work are much more important than the game and if its going to make you happier to get out of the game then so be it. I'm sure you will be missed by all your teammates and fans. I'm glad you're sticking around here though. You definitely deserve a big round of applause for all the hard work and dedication that you have put forth.

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  #5  
Old 03-12-2006, 05:39 AM
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colonel_moo colonel_moo is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

thats sad to hear, but i understand, and im sure everyone else does too. i cant tell you how many times ive considered quitting paintball. i dont really play anymore, my gear just kinda sits in the corner collecting dust until the few times a year i actually go out and play, but i just cant sell it. two of my friends and ex-teammates have quit paintball to finance their car projects, one of them is seriously considering quitting, and the other few have drifted away from the group. that doesnt leave me with too many people to play with, but i just cant bring myself to quit. paintball is a part of me, ive put so much time and money into it, quitting just doesnt seem right. and i know that if i do sell my gear, i will regret it in a month, and just wish i could go play again.
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  #6  
Old 03-12-2006, 05:58 AM
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bamf-hacker bamf-hacker is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

We are losing a friend on the field but we still have him here on the Internet. I am with Shunut and want to give you a round of applause.




Thank you for all of your help and mentoring you have done here for the many who come here for advise.

If you ever decided to go on a road trip with the family to Washington DC, bring your marker, I'll play against you

Good luck Vike with all that you do!

HacKeR
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  #7  
Old 03-12-2006, 06:16 AM
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DyNasty9 DyNasty9 is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

Quote:
Originally Posted by bamf-hacker

If you ever decided to go on a road trip with the family to Washington DC, bring your marker, I'll play against you



HacKeR
noo you cant leave what if my shocker starts acting up agian???
but i have faith in the others here
round of applause most definatly


so your totally giving it up, selling the guns and the gear. idk im going to have to make a prediction and say you cant go 2 months without playing

but anyway ya im sure anyone on this forum would wana play against you it would be an honor.
good luck vike
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  #8  
Old 03-12-2006, 06:37 AM
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03TiburonGT 03TiburonGT is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

Sad to see it all end for you vike. I can remember the first couple of times I came to these boards and started asking noob questions and reviving all these old threads. I then remember that you were one of the first to help me out and not flame me for being, well, a noob. I guess that if it isn't fun, and you're spending money to do it, why do it? I think you made a good decision for your situation, but I think you should keep the Sonix or something just in case. Good luck with the next stage in your life
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  #9  
Old 03-12-2006, 07:29 AM
NB_Hacker_NB NB_Hacker_NB is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

Don't know you, but seems you have your life headed in the right direction, good luck on your teaching stuff!
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  #10  
Old 03-12-2006, 07:38 AM
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QAZ123 QAZ123 is offline
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Default Re: Farewell to paintball

Sad to see you go Vike but yeah there's other thing's in life beside's paintball. Heck if you just stated you were quitting paintball to concentrate on running it would be understandable.

I would suggest though to sell off some of your gear but not all of it just to go out every once in a while to recball it or hit up a scenario game sometime.

Good luck with your writing and eveything else you choose to do!

JB.
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