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  #11  
Old 05-15-2008, 07:42 PM
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battlechaser battlechaser is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris once ate 2 72 ounce steaks in 45 minutes, he spent the first half hour having sex with the waitress.
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  #12  
Old 05-15-2008, 07:51 PM
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OSOK OSOK is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2007
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

God said "Let there be light!" and Chuck Norris said "Say please..."
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  #13  
Old 05-15-2008, 07:59 PM
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xsvly-fat xsvly-fat is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck norris blows bubbles with beef jerky.
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  #14  
Old 05-16-2008, 02:49 AM
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HelpDeskHustler HelpDeskHustler is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

these are all terrible for the record and chuck norris jokes are old. That being said....

Chuck norris doesn't sleep, he waits.

Chuck norris doesn't go hunting since that implies uncertainty of success, chuck norris goes killing.

superman wears chuck norris pajamas

the boogie looks in his closet every night before he goes to bed to make sure chuck norris isn't there.

chuck norris once shot down a plane by pointing into the air with his finger and yelling "bang"

whilst engaging in intercorce, chuck norris never lets his wife on be on top, because he never ****s up.
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  #15  
Old 05-16-2008, 03:28 AM
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DFSniper DFSniper is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

chuck norris has two speeds, walk and kill.

brokeback mountain isn't a movie, its what chuck norris calls the pile of dead bodies behind his house.
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(7:11:05 PM) Battlechaser: Did you just slaughter George Clooney and steal his mojo..?
"Death doesn't exist. It never did, it never will. But we've drawn so many pictures of it, so many years, trying to pin it down, comprehend it, we've got to think of it as an entity, strangely alive and greedy."
- from Ray Bradbury's Something Wicked this Way Comes
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  #16  
Old 05-16-2008, 09:09 AM
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kramernator kramernator is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

when Chuck Norris does push ups he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the world down

Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding

the grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there, then it is stained with blood.
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  #17  
Old 05-16-2008, 10:39 AM
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shunut shunut is offline

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Default Re: Chuck Norris

If Chuck Norris was here, he'd close this thread, then hunt everyone down who posted these lame jokes.
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  #18  
Old 05-16-2008, 12:16 PM
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HelpDeskHustler HelpDeskHustler is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

According to M-theory, chuck norris is everywhere, including here. According to chuck norris, he's wherever the **** he wants to be.
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  #19  
Old 05-16-2008, 01:03 PM
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Team Ramrod Team Ramrod is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

The best part of waking up is NOT Folgers in your cup. It's knowing Chuck Norris let you live through the night!
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  #20  
Old 05-16-2008, 01:06 PM
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kidonfire kidonfire is offline
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Default Re: Chuck Norris

There is no chin under Chuck Norris' beard, only another fist.

When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
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