Thread: Soc Gdt
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Old 11-11-2011, 07:17 PM
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marvin-martian marvin-martian is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: virginia beach, va
Posts: 4,650
Default Re: Soc Gdt

This past week I went into crisis/mental breakdown mode and fear I am leaving it feeling lost and unsure of where to go or what I should be doing.

For a while now (2 years?) my plan was to study poli sci and enter the Navy and hopefully become an Intel officer. I just started commuting 45mins each way to a different university this semester and have not really been enjoying myself. Two of my classes are enjoyable, but everything else including the university itself feels like a wash. I have been highly aware of the fact that the military could very well not accept me due to my speech impediment (I stutter) but always felt like I could make it through MEPS despite everything. Oh, I have also just signed up to use my dad's GI Bill this semester, which still isn't in despite it being 2-3 months later.

So now lets cut to last weekend. My friend John and I went up to Richmond to see Cameron and his wife one last time before they move to Jacksonville to start his real Navy life. That was fun etc but I got sick and it will probably be...a long time before I get to see them again. I fight constant headaches and fog and sleep all that following Monday to write a paper due that night. The paper was completed and acceptable so I took it to class in time. This is a distance learning class with an off-site professor and 4 locations besides my own. So anyway, we all have to present our stuff and the way it works is you press and hold a mic on your desk and have a camera on the wall swivel to you in order to broadcast you to everybody else. Not a stutter friendly environment. I was called last at the end of the night and lets just say it was the worst I have done with any sort of presentation since the seventh grade. My Navy ambitions are now shot.

On the way to class Tuesday, my car broke down on the highway, causing me to get a tow. Missed that class, but the test he gave out is on Blackboard so whatever. Turns out my car had 1,300 dollars worth of damages, half of which we paid and it is now...running. That night I attempted to drop a different class which I am failing (that was the deadline), but there are holds on my account so it would not let me. Awesome.

As of this writing I have not been to any class since Monday night and just generally feel tired and over it. I am not happy with what I'm doing, where I am, my goal just vanished and I am just lost.
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