I have to agree with you on the Protege. It will not get you anything just sitting around. Sell it while it's value's still so high, and if you want one later on... keep most of the money in savings just for that purpose (most, not all... they're still really extremely good on resale... just wait until Cup hits, that'll be the test!).
I think that if you work at it, you can do really well with a pump. Look at Ted (Ace24). His pump team's been top 5 of the circuit they're in against semi's. That might be because they are very experienced vs the semi's who are nubes, but still, they are proving that you can win. If you're determined enough, it should be fine enough that you shouldn't feel the urge for speed. I know when I'm pumping, I get in the groove, the "zone," whatever the hell you want to call it, and I'm just all around playing better. You, I think, can do the same if you put your mind to it. You're a perfectionist, and normally don't snap as easily as you're purporting. Gain some confidence in yourself, dude!
That's just me, and I'm going with option B because I think that you should cash out the Protege while it's still worth $500. And like Vike said... ya only need one pump.
EDIT: read your post after I put mine up. If they can't afford one, but an extremely cheap one, then. The step above Blades, like a Hammer or something. $75 at most.
As far as exercise, don't be unreasonable. You can run around your dorm building until you pass out for FREE. You don't NEED to play paintball to keep slim.