Anyone who wears a Military or Family Tartan Kilt knows that you must wear it in the "regimental" style…or “run reg (pronounced r-edge
).” This means that you wear NO underwear or ANY type of undergarment at all. This in itself can pose some unique problems to the paintballer…
TIPS ON GOING ‘REG…’
WATCH WHERE YOU SQUAT!!
If you are the unlucky one who has the field owner that doesn’t cut underbrush all the way to the ground, a squat or crouch can put the underbrush in a place you don’t want it. Sticks, twigs and broken branches have a way of cropping up at the worst times…and in the worst places. God help you if you encounter poison ivy, sumac or even the Scottish Thistle!
I suggest you play in the standing position. No one behind you wants to see what’s up your kilt. This can also provide some problems with any ladies that may be behind you or spectators in the stands. The snake or zipper + a Kilt = a bad combination if you are ‘reg.’
KEEP YOUR KNEES TOGETHER!!
If you feel the need to squat or crouch, keeping your knees together may just keep that ‘bounce’ off the ground from getting “up-and-in-there”…if you know what I mean...
STAY OUT OF THE BRIARS!!
Yeah, the other players are laughing at the distraction of you in a Kilt but since those wussies are wearing pants, they’re not bleeding to death from a thousand thorn scratches on their bare legs. Travel into briars or wild roses and you will look like a litter of kittens ran laps up and down your legs.
GET A SPORRAN!!
A sporran is the original “groin protector” hanging on the front of the Kilt. In its original version, it was several layers of waxed animal hide, laminated together. Now it serves a primarily decorative function but regardless, it is suspended in front of you by a chain with leather belt tips. There are two belt loops on the pleated panel of the Kilt. Feed the two ends through them and secure them. There are two versions of a sporran:
The military versions are normally adorned with Silver or chrome, semi-precious or precious stones, decorative studding, locks of horse hair and tassels. Typically, there is no pocket or pouch. This version is unsuitable for paintball purposes except as groin protection.
The other version resembles a muzzle loader’s leather “Possible Bag” -- that is, it looks like a plain, all-leather pouch with a cover flap. There can be embossing and/or plain leather tassels attached…whatever…but this one’s a ‘pouch’ style. This is an excellent choice for us because it’s extremely useful for storing barrel bags, flex-squeegees, smokes, stock-class tubes, Dow 33….whatever. It serves a third purpose of holding down the front of your kilt.
When guys sit down to rest, they tend to sit with their knees apart. Well, in a Kilt, this can become a problem. Not for a ‘lack of pride’ but the term ‘out of sight, out of mind’ comes to forethought. You won’t realize that you are flashing the entire area until it’s too late. Cross your feet at the ankles to keep from ‘violating’ people’s vision.
Another problem is that when you sit in a Kilt, the back panel tends to ‘fold up’ like an accordion underneath you…leaving your bare ‘bottom’ exposed to whatever you are going to sit on. A metal bleacher seat roasting in the sun can leave a nice burn and wooden park benches provide nice toothpick-sized splinters in spots you don’t want them…and where others won’t go near, to remove. Picture a lady in a skirt that’s getting ready to sit. She takes her hand and sweeps the skirt towards her knees-this is what needs to be done to sit in a Kilt.
If you are worried about offending someone…or are just plain-old SCARED
…put on a pair of swimming trunks or slider shorts underneath the Kilt.
TRADITIONAL CELTIC ACCESSORIES
– Is described above and is extremely useful, as well as functional.
Black accessory belt with buckle
– Is described above but the original purpose was to hold the scabbard for a Dirk. A Dirk is a Scottish short-sword but for paintballing purposes, it will help hold your Kilt in place, as well as accept belt-less pod packs, renegade air pouches or other similar equipment bags.
- Typically, knitted wool socks or ‘hose’ are worn with a Kilt. This will do nothing more than attract burrs, briars and help in overheating your body. The accessory that goes with the wool hose are ‘flashes.’ These are the colored tabs on the sides. Again, this is a useless accessory that is a waste of money for our purposes.
- means “Black Knife” and it is typically seen in the hose of the Kilted male. Originally hidden in the man's tunic, it was their "pocket knife: and used for cutting dinner, odd jobs and yes...hand-to-hand combat. When they would visit friends in that friend’s home, it was revealed and inserted into the hose as a sign of respect and non-malice towards the host. Obviously, there is no need for this on a paintball field.
– Allows you to pin the lower corner of the front-most panel to the panel underneath it…limiting the amount of ‘flap’ the front panel will have without it. A male’s Kilt pin is normally a depiction of a sword or broad-axe with a pin-backing, it may even have a broadsword and broad axe crossed. Perhaps it could look like mine, a Clan Crest - and a lady’s Kilt pin resembles a very large and plain safety pin.
- Is generally a military term for a jacket-like garment. Simplified, in 1776, we referred to the British as the "Red Coats." Their coat is a tunic. It can be single or double breasted, depending on Circa but for the most part, double-breasted tunics were very, very common. Single and double-breasted jackets are much like a suit jacket you would wear to a semi-formal function. "Single" just buttons in the center/front and a "double" buttons on the left and right sides of your body. Again, an expensive option if that's what you want to wear on the field.
- Original Kilts were one long, toga-looking things called the "Great Kilt.' It wrapped around the body and then flung over the one shoulder. It was your tent, blanket, pillow and rain poncho all rolled into one. Current Traditional Kilts have been separated from the plaid. The new Plaid is a long, layered band of material about 8" wide and about 8-10 feet long. It starts at the left shoulder, wraps diagonally around the back to the right arm-pit, under the right arm and diagonally across the chest to the left shoulder and pinned in place with a Broach. The Plaid is then opened to create sort of a "cape" over the left shoulder and you see these on Military bands on parade. Obviously, it will hinder us in Paintball by getting caught on everything in the woods...but it's a nice addition to the Dress uniform.
- the soft wool black cap that reminds you on the Navy Officer's pointed cover. It has a cap badge of the regiment and a Hackle (feather).
- Also referred to as a Tamisham or "Tam" for short, looks like an adaptation of a French Beret. Um...I don't like them...lol.
- Mostly seen on Drum Majors because the Ostrich feathers make it around $900 US or more.
A complete Uniform can run upwards from $2000-$6000 depending on your authenticity and accessories used.
I also play the bagpipes. My stand is a set of Lawrie pipes that I had carbon dated (by Martin Guitar, Nazareth, PA) to 'pre-1900.' Obviously, I don't take them to the field but having a boom-box or loud speaker system playing 78th Frasier Highlanders, Glasgow Police Pipe Band or The Black Watch gives an awesome effect. Leave Enya and Phil Coultier at home or you might fall asleep in the middle of a battle
SUGGESTED PAINTBALL RELATED ACCESSORIES
Gel-type knee pads and/or shin guards, over knee-length tube socks and cleats. Also, a stick-Squeegee in a leg-scabbard would be a good idea.
Redz Packs should slip right over the black accessory belt but may exhibit some ‘up and down’ play because of the difference in the belt width-to the belt slot-differences in the pack.