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vikingshadow
06-13-2006, 06:44 PM
I saw this a few years ago, but it just made so much darn sense, I thought I'd post it for you youngsters out there....remember, it'll happen to all of us sooner or later!

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Life

On the first day, God created the dog and said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said: "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.

The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?"

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said: "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said: "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said: "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But man said: "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

marvin-martian
06-13-2006, 06:45 PM
when does school start back up?

vikingshadow
06-13-2006, 06:56 PM
Hahaha! :p

Hossy
06-13-2006, 07:00 PM
hahaha another great post by vike!

i read in an article that the new life span for kids being born now is 150 years old! believe that?

vikingshadow
06-13-2006, 07:06 PM
Ok, s.o.b.ering thought here after a fun post...(dang filter...)

I was in a meeting a couple years ago, and they pulled up some stats that said that if a middle class male, anywhere from 30-45 years old, is working in a decent job (one where bills are being paid on time and able to set back some for retirement) his lifespan is predicted to reach 125 years old.

A 20-25 year old middle class male, working in a decent job was predicted to reach 150 years old. Here's the catch though. Retirement right now is set at about 70 years for me and all of you younger than me. That leaves people anywhere from 55 years to 80 years to live on pensions and the government. Guess what? The money's not going to be there for very long!

Guess you guys as young as 16 better start planning for retirement NOW!

marvin-martian
06-13-2006, 07:09 PM
doesnt retirement age go up with lifespan?

claustrophobia9
06-13-2006, 07:16 PM
doesnt retirement age go up with lifespan?
it does, once you reach 40 it shoots up 10 years.

Edit: i was thinking life expectancy... but yea that too.

vikingshadow
06-13-2006, 08:12 PM
Retirement goes up when the government feels it should. It just raised to 70, oh, I don't know, probably 5-10 years ago. I figure as slow as they move, it'll go up again in another 10-15 years - either way, it looks like I'll be working until I'm 110...

thechubbss12
06-14-2006, 08:18 AM
Humm I think i will probibly die when im about 60.... give me a good life and no substancial problem for the gove to deal with.... Youth In Asian FTL.....

claustrophobia9
06-14-2006, 08:20 AM
Humm I think i will probibly die when im about 60.... give me a good life and no substancial problem for the gove to deal with.... Youth In Asian FTL.....
we had people who had to debate euthanasia and they actually debated child laybor in asian countries.... it was so incredibly pathetic.

Hossy
06-14-2006, 08:56 AM
hey vike when are those Of the Month Threads gonna come out?

vikingshadow
06-14-2006, 09:05 AM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v402/vikingshadow/smilies/Off-Topic.gif

Geez! Be patient, people! It's only the middle of the second week of June....usually comes out around the end of the month. I'll let everyone know when it's time. :)