View Full Version : Software Upgrade

12-30-2008, 08:55 AM
Software Upgrade:

Do not install any of these programs if you have "In The Doghouse (http://bewareofthedoghouse.com/VideoPage.aspx)" previously installed on your hardrive.

Dear Technical Support,

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2,
which I had used for years without any trouble.
However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and
the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several
other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9.
Successive versions of Girlfriend proved no better.

I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and
left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for
several weeks. Eventually, I tried to run Girlfriend 1.2 and
Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two
systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.

I eventually upgraded to Fiancé 1.0, only to discover that this
product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0
tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with
FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2008.

Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be
very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were
automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted.

They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them.
Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and
can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge.
These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess
what the problem is.

Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express
which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0
attachés itself to my Saab 93 Convertible hard drive, it often

Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw,
which can't be turned off.

Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2008, but there could
be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife
1.0 detects Mistress 2008, it tends to delete all of your Money before
uninstalling itself.

Help requested please

And the flip side...

__________________________________________________ ___________

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the
Flower and Jewelery applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 UN-installed many other valuable programs,
such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable
programs such as Football 5.0, Rugby 4.3 and Cricket 3.0. Conversation
8.0 no longer runs; it simply crashes the system. I've tried running
Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail. What can I do?




Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Try entering the command:
C:/ITHOUGHTYOULOVEDME to download Tears 6.2, which should
automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works as
designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications
Jewelery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above
application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5,
Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.

WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create Snoring

CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law. This is not a
supported application and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory
and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to
improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0
and Lingerie 7.7.

12-30-2008, 09:20 AM
Hilarity at it's finest.

12-30-2008, 11:20 AM
wow i never knew that

12-30-2008, 02:44 PM
*checks over shoulders* ... so true.. :p