View Full Version : Wish us luck

04-25-2008, 09:32 AM
Well, some of you may remember what's going on with my custody issues but most may not so I'll lay out the basics. Back in September our kids' biological father took his mediated custody to enroll them in school on the reservation after he got out of jail. At this point, the end of summer, we had had them enrolled in school in town and had them in our custody since February. Well, he said he was going to enroll them at the reservation and be living there. We had our weekend custody and the usual arrangement was for his sister to come and pick them up from our house and drop them off. This happened a couple of weeks in a row as normal then one day she said that he never brought them "down". This was strange because they live 7 miles east and we're in a valley. Down would mean that they were up the hill somewhere, closest town being 30 miles away.

Well, his father happens to live about 80 miles north at another reservation. So we asked her what she means "down" and she told us that he "took off" with them up to where his dad lives and then left them there and his dad took emergency custody of them and enrolled them in school there without ever trying to reach us. Obviously she was aiding in this whole thing. At this point she told us that we have a hearing 3 days away in this town that's 80 miles away. We filed an emergency order with the local tribe and took jurisdiction because we had a previous order stating that we have joint custody. We won that one even though his father was trying to say we're not fit parents because we're not tribal members (they don't realize that I am a tribal member, just not that tribe. I'm just to white to be recognized).

Since then they picked up their dad (he's been on parole this whole time) about 2 months later. This whole time he's had visitation according to the emergency order. He stopped by once when he got out of jail in February and we haven't heard anything from him since. Now we have another hearing today which is a mixture of a follow up to the emergency order and a full blown custody modification. He hasn't responded to the custody modification at all, and that deadline was Wednesday.

So we have it laid out that he gets supervised weekend visitation (due to the previous abandonment, not to mention his constant drug use and psychotic violence in front of the kids) with no overnight visitation. I don't think we should have a problem since he hasn't even tried exercising his current rights but my wife is still terrified to death of him (that's enough to fill an entire forum, not just one thread) and it's likely that he's still going to show up today and try to scare her into submission like he did at the original mediation (I wasn't allowed in because we were only engaged at the time), and he's probably hoping to catch us off guard. He's said before that the only reason he wants custody is to keep her from having them and he doesn't think it's fair that he should have to pay child support. We've already discussed that we don't care if he pays child support. We don't need his money, I'm perfectly capable of providing for my family and when it comes down to it, all he is is a sperm donor, not a father.

Well, I guess that's a pretty good rant/release. So like I said in the title, wish us luck, pray for us to whoever it is you pray to. Hopefully this all ends soon so my wife can start living her life without fear, I can go play some paintball without worrying about her and the kids.

04-25-2008, 10:18 AM
good luck, again! hopefully he gets no more than what he deserves.

04-25-2008, 12:38 PM
Good luck...My old man and my wifes old man were both "sperm donors" (we thought we were the only ones to use that term!)

Hopefully the judge has had enough and won't bend to what I like to call here in Michigan "tribal racism".

04-25-2008, 04:00 PM
Good luck...My old man and my wifes old man were both "sperm donors" (we thought we were the only ones to use that term!)

Hopefully the judge has had enough and won't bend to what I like to call here in Michigan "tribal racism".
They tried that at the first emergency hearing, stating that his father should have custody just because we weren't tribal members and that was their only defense. They just don't know that I'm a member of the Spokane Tribe.

Well, we just got back and we were the only ones there. Our lawyer called us before we left and informed us that his caniving (sp?) sister informed the court that he's been incarcerated and she wants to file continuance papers on his behalf. We had our motion for default judgment filed and she never even filed those papers as of the hearing time.

:smash: Judge said due to his constant incarceration and failure to appear at ANY of the hearings that we get our default judgment, stating that we have full primary custody and he is only allowed "limited supervised visitation" and he has to pay all of our attorney's fees throughout this case. We'll never see the money since he doesn't work, especially considering he's in jail all the time. It will be funny if he tries appealing the decision.

Think about it = "Sir, I should have custody of them because I wasn't able to appear and defend myself because I was in jail at the time and it's just not fair that I couldn't show up, even though I had twenty days before I went to jail for the 12th time to show that I really do care about them.":roflmao:

04-25-2008, 04:03 PM
hopefully he gets no more than what he deserves.

wow, i was right! glad things worked out on your end!

04-25-2008, 07:35 PM
sounds like things went well

04-25-2008, 07:50 PM
Well, at least the kids will continue to have some positive role models in their lives.

I'm a firm believer in karma, and it looks like Carson Daily was right. ;)